Like, if this sounds familiar:
Funke snooped through her
boyfriend’s phone and found something she didn’t like. She’s been obsessing
over it for days, wondering whether that EMOJI was really just a friendly one.
“Does it look suggestive? Do you think he’s really watching football? Or is he
with that girl from work that he sent that EMOJI to?”
First you’re using your
girlfriend’s phone to check the scores while she picks out an outfit for dinner.
Then you’re scrolling through her texts. Next thing you know, you’re practicing
your ninja skills every time she leaves the room—you silently summersault over
to her phone at lightning speed, just to see if anything is amiss. Meanwhile,
your heart hammers as you listen for her footsteps coming down the hall. Be
warned: if she doesn’t get you, the anxiety of getting caught will.
We’re all a little quirky. Our
phones have become a diary for our weirdness. We have silly pictures to cheer
us up on a bad day, notes in the notebook app, inside jokes with friends, and
many more.
Snooping will end you up in
learning things about yourself that you didn’t want to know; Remember that time
Jimmy really pushed your buttons
because he watched Kumkum Bhagya without you? In the heat of the moment you
text your best friend a ton of horrible things that you didn’t really mean
but had to say—like how he’s a rotten, TV spoiling jerk with no feelings.
Well, unless you want to hear
about all of your flaws, you’re
better off not snooping.
In the world of smart phones,
dating is a whole new game. We text instead of call. We find perfect matches
with the swipe of our thumbs. We start and end relationships by pressing
“send”.
Where are the boundaries? With
the simple press of a button, you have access to everything your loved one does
on their phone- every tweet, text, email, and phone call.
Sure, you are curious. But should
you peek? YES! or NO!
The truth to a successful
relationship is trust. When you start dating someone, you aren’t just trusting
them to be physically faithful anymore. We also expect them to refrain from
unfaithfulness when we aren’t looking. The central question to dating nowadays
is, can you fully trust someone unless you know what they are doing on facebook
or who they are texting? There is no concrete answer, but it is certainly an
interesting concept to grapple with.
Every couple has their own
protocol for what level of communication is appropriate. Some couple hardly
question or think about their partner’s texting and online habits. Some couple
too feel the need to know exactly where their partner is and who they are
speaking to at all times. The capital offense is snooping through one another’s
text messages when they are unauthorized to do so.
I believe that the root reason
people go through one another’s phones is more than “curiosity.” I think those
who feel the need to go through their partner’s phone are doing so because they
aren’t entirely convinced their partner is trustworthy. These hunches seem to
be overwhelmingly verified once they go through their partner’s phone but
shouldn’t a relationship be based off of an underlying level of trust that is
strong enough to stop you from going through their messages?
The unfortunate thing about
texting is that sometimes fairly innocent conversations can be perceived as far
worse than they really are.
Our virtual lives should be kept
private. You shouldn’t have to explain why you answered someone’s text or call.
Couples end up arguing about random texting conversations that meant nothing. I
think invading our partner’s privacy by going through their messages causes far
more harm than good. Innocent things cause arguments.
If you find out your partner is
lying or cheating, suddenly you are guilty of invading their personal phone
which isn’t a small offense either.
All in all, my personal opinion
is that you have no grounds, no matter what the situation is, to go through
your partner’s phone. If you are overwhelmingly suspicious that something is
going on between your partner and someone else, should you really be with that
person anyways?
Relationships are about trust. It
takes a long time to build this trust, and just a moment to destroy it. Don’t
let that moment be you snooping through your loved one’s phone.
As scary as it can be to place
your heart in someone’s hands and trust them not to break it, it’s well worth
building a strong, trusting relationship. Besides, would you want your
significant other to invade your
privacy? Not a chance!
Respect each other’s boundaries
and build your relationship on a solid foundation of trust.
Agree? Disagree? Leave your
comments
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